Grandparents Parenting Grandchildren Assignment 4-1
This week’s current popular culture topic for me is grandparents raising their grandchildren. This syndrome is at a record high, and I am a part of it since my husband and I have had our two grandsons’ for 5 months. I have to admit at first, it seemed like there was no way that we could do it. With a few arguments and time, we all adjusted to it. But, no matter how the kids adjust we are not mommy and daddy. It is hard to hear one of the them cry for mommy, or Shaun our 7 year old grandson say that he misses when they all lived together. Our 6 year old grand-daughter Chloe, is with the daddy at his mothers house living. If you herd their father talk, he believes that he did nothing wrong.
For seven years our daughter and son-in-law lived together, and he worked maybe a year. Our daughter work even less, and so everyone else payed the bills and the reason was to help the small children. Now our son-in-law wants our oldest grandson to live with him at his mother’s house, and his main reason is so that he can avoid paying us child support. It makes me angry, and all we have is a piece of paper that gives us power of attorney. At anytime either parent of the boys can come and take them. When 5 months have gone by, and neither parent has made major advances we don’t feel that they deserve any of the children.
For anyone reading this blog, if you are going to make babies then please grow up first. This epidemic needs to make a major adjustment, and the real parents need to step up and take responsibility. We did our parenting and when this happens, all we can do is reflect back and ask ourselves what we did wrong? There is website after web site dedicated to grandparents, and facts that can help you to know what help is out there. AARP which is centered on senior citizens is the most helpful web site.
I couldn’t sleep at night if I let my grandchildren go to a foster home. This is best for the kids, and I really don’t see their parents changing their behavior. So, if you read this and feel discouraged search the Internet for help.
2 comments:
JiLL,
I was 18 when I got pregnant. I thought my life was over. I am 21 now, I work a full time job and attend Franklin Full time. My boyfriend and I just bought our first home. I feel so bad for you and your husband. It was crazy what happend to me and yes I had to miss out on a lot but I had to grow up. You are doing the right thing and people like your are what we need more of in this world. I wish the best for you and your family.
Brittany Ponto
Jill-
What a heartfelt, very personal, and educational post. Thank-you. I know grandparents that are raising their grandchild. In their case, the parents rights were terminated so they don't have to worry about the child being taken from them. You are right as good as some foster homes are many are not good and there can be a risk of abuse. Also, children in foster care can be bounced around from home to parents to home. There seems to be a false belief in this country that biology is best. I think the only way families can stay together in these situations is to have long term intervention and education for every family member. For families a week here and month there of intervention absolutely doesn't work.
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